As I think about writing my last column of the year, I ask myself how I can pack the richness of the year’s experiences, the growth and changes that have occurred as well as some valuable horses healing humans healing horses information for you into a short paragraph!?

So this is what I’ll do… I will give you some of my favourite insights into how a conscious horse-human connection is so helpful, followed by an update on a subject I am most passionate about, topped off by a few photos from my last visit to the New England Brumby Sanctuary (NEBS).

1. Have you noticed the pull between wanting to fit in and belong and wanting to stand out and be different? They are like two forces pulling in opposite directions, creating internal (and external) tension. I spoke about this with several young people in their twenties and they could really relate to this conflict. We agreed that all the way through school in a mainstream system, individual uniqueness is not encouraged.

Recognizing and nurturing our uniqueness create peace, contentment and self-love, which relieve this tension. The need for comparison dissolves and competition becomes friendly, playful, inclusive and with everyone walking away a winner.

Horses know and live this inclusive uniqueness. They are always authentic and themselves with a unique place in the herd. They are unique and belong at the same time. This is what we can learn from all of nature – the Gumtree doesn’t try to be a Poinciana. A lettuce hardly aspires to being a potato. The rose doesn’t look down at the ‘weed’ with an air of self-importance.

When I sit with my herd I observe and feel them, I marvel at their individual traits and their unique expression. Invariably I get an increased awareness and a deeper sense of myself and of everything surrounding me.

I am impressed at how horses play, how they test their strength and speed and if there is an outcome with a ‘winner’ and a ‘looser’ (human terms), even the ‘looser’ comes back for another round. Winning a play fight seems to mean nothing beyond that. No conclusions are drawn from the outcome. No judgements are passed. As humans we observe a pecking order in a herd of horses with one horse being over another yet the higher-ranking horse is not any more important in the tapestry of the whole herd and greater whole. Humans find that hard to understand. Horses understand their own and each others uniqueness.

2. Highly sensitive people and empaths can experience feeling anger around people who are incongruent and don’t express outwardly what is really going on inside but instead act from a mask.

Horses perceive incongruent people as a threat to the integrity of the herd as these people are not in touch with their internal environment and therefore cannot draw cues from it as to the external environment. Horses respond to this tension between the pulling forces. They feel unsafe and may stay at a distance, withdraw altogether or even show signs of aggression as a protection (aggression – anger).

It is not necessary to work things out or necessarily be peaceful and happy. All that is required is to become congruent, the pull in opposite directions seizes and a stillpoint emerges even if just momentarily. This is the moment when people often sigh and horses yawn. Tension is released and the energy flows again.

How?

First, set an intention of holding space for yourself and within this space establish a regular practice of paying attention to your breathing, feeling your breath flow in and out of your body (or being stuck), sensations arising in your physical body, emotions rising (or wanting to rise), thoughts crossing the mind (accept all, then change your focus back to your breath and body) and inner voices speaking to you and sometimes even back and forth amongst themselves (no, you are not crazy!).

Early Sufi practises and the teachings of Jesus already speak about this… set the table, invite the guests, let each one speak so every voice feels heard and can relax and not try so hard to be heard… making peace between the waring parts within follows naturally.

From this place of peace and safety, allow your own light to come forth and shine. Be a light upon yourself. Shine your light upon the world.

There are some of a few of my favourite shots from my last visit to the New England Brumby Sanctuary near Guyra in NSW. Enjoy them and please do visit the website of savethebrumbies and maybe you can adopt a Brumby too!?

For more information on Beate Sommer go to: taketime2smellthehorses

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Verandah Magazine’s spokesperson for all things ‘horse’, Beate Sommer from Aurora Valley, talks about how to have a ‘soft’ connection with our four-legged friends, and we can relate it to our two-legged companions as well…

Over the years I’ve often asked myself what exactly is ‘connection’ with our horses? Is it a physical feel? Is it mental clarity or an emotional flow?  Or is it maybe all of those things.

What I’ve come to believe is that to me connection is a soft feel, a clear mind and emotional awareness. If the feel is not soft, the mind not clear and the emotions not flowing, it is not a connection, it’s more likely a disconnection or a block, or a distortion leading to a misunderstanding and miscommunication.

Horses notice everything around them, near and far, while being acutely aware of their internal environment at the same time.  We can learn from horses how to become more attentive, how to sharpen our senses, how to be tuned into everything without losing connection with ourselves. They teach us how to bring our focus back to ourselves, how to notice, sense, assess, decide and act all in a short space of time, and then to return to ‘Self’ instead of having our focus hijacked and scattered.  Horses are keenly observant yet without judgement. They take everything as it presents itself and experience energy in its purest form.

Horses interacting – playing, noticing, assessing…all ‘in the moment’

Misbehaviour in a horse is a form of communication. Looking at it from this perspective means we don’t have to judge it as bad and we don’t have to punish the horse. Horsemanship becomes a lot more inclusive instead of being exclusive. Everything is welcome and allows us to know the horse a little better. This is a step towards more softness and connection.

Just think how tolerant horses are of our misbehaviours! They are constantly trying to read us – our body language, our verbal cues, our thoughts and our emotions. Plus they can tune into our heart rate, body odours, even our slightest muscular tensions.

Horses also experience our misbehaviour as a form of communication. They sense when we are incongruent. Our incongruence lies in the energy blocks, the random and often unfocussed thoughts, our deeper and more hidden emotions, our intention and so on. Horses respond to these rather unconscious aspects of ourselves. They also respond to us when we are soft and connected and then they become soft too and we experience flow and harmony, even if just for the briefest moment. It is important to pause after such special moments to let them into your whole system so your being can remember the joy later on.

When we have softness we no longer need boundaries but until we have softness, boundaries are necessary. This is true for relationships with people too.  Connection with our horses presupposes connection with Self. Let us be soft with ourselves, especially in moments of misbehaviour. If we can be soft in our approach to ourselves, the misbehaviour-like communication, the disconnection from that aspect, which communicates in a distorted way, will feel safe to be seen and acknowledged.

Learn to read yourself honestly and with kindness. Speak to yourself in the same way. Soften those parts within that have become rigid. Then we can relax and our brains can think of creative ways to be and do with the horse. Our hearts offer us the kindness and patience to make the best decision in each moment. Our gut tells us what is safe and what is not.

Practise connecting the three centers of intelligence: head, heart, gut.

I read somewhere that ‘hate is just a funny kind of love standing upside down’. I’m mentioning it because in a way any misbehaviour is like that… love standing upside down.

So, keep grounded, listen to your heart and gut, and be guided by Spirit. Then your mind will use its positive, creative intelligence and your decisions will be for the higher good of All.

AURORA VALLEY Take Time to Smell the Horses offers Natural Horsemanship with Emotional Awareness, Equine Assisted Learning and Equine Facilitated Energy Healing.

“Horses and Nature as a Path to Awakening, 31 Authentic Voice Cards for Heart Centered Emotional Intelligence – Daily Inspiration and Practical Wisdom straight from the Horse’s Mouth”
by Beate Maria Sommer

Available now from: taketime2smellthehorses

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